Wednesday, July 7, 2010
Summer Smiles, Dicipline and 2 year olds
Okay so I've been neglecting this blog. Can you blame me? I'm pretty busy these days. Having my own business and two kids under two (okay now he's over two) but you get the idea...
I couldn't resist posting these photos of Owen with the garden hose.
As Owen approached age two, it became obvious that this kid was going to give us a run for our money. He whined, he cried, repeat. He does things because he knows we don't want him to, he especially likes to tempt fate when you are holding Harper because he knows you have no hands to stop him... You find yourself getting so irritated and losing your "cool, calm and collected" self. You like to think you never yell at your kids, then you find yourself grabbing their arm and saying, "because we are going upstairs to change your diaper now... and dragging them upstairs..."
I have been hoping to find a great book about discipline and many "formal" methods have been suggested. I bought the Supernanny book, and the Magic 1, 2, 3 but none of that sat well with me. Afterall, I'm starting from scratch, and I felt like I should be able to mold this kid into a well behaved child simply by example. I had an interesting conversation with my friend Dara and she suggested this PATH program and the book is out of print but I subscribe to his "Daily Groove" digest emails. I haven't paid to be a part of his forum program, but I plan to.
When your child spills his milk for the 5th time of the day ask yourself? Is it really worth getting ANGRY over? Your child is 2 years old. They are looking for your reaction. If you simply clean it up (perhaps even have them help clean WITH you) and avoid the commentary... "this is the THIRD time I've had to clean up after you, son, and I'm sick of it, I can't tell you how glad I'll be the day you never spill your milk again...." they will stop doing it. Maybe not today, maybe not tomorrow but they will stop and they will just come to a realization that spilling milk isn't that great. Scott's whole parenting approach (as I understand it) is focused on the parent experiencing power WITH your child rather than controlling your child through dominance. It's an interesting concept. Basically ruling with mutual respect. I like that. It's hard in the moment to center yourself, breath and NOT get angry but it's worth it. It's all about your reaction.
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